blargity!

Okay, you all know by now that i get infatuated with stuff all the time.

So… right now?
Questionable Content.
I’ve been reading for two weeks from teh first one and I’m just caught up.
I am definitely a Faye kind of person- no touchy!
rawr. fckin awkward hilarousness.

also, yall are invited to my halloween party.
*nods*
I’m going to be Coraline.
And Cash will be Dogzilla.
Gotta modify his costume.
apparently he’s too beefy for an XL and I need to add elastic bands if I want his mostrous legs to fit in the sleeves.

another thought- that thingie in between our top lip?
I bet they get more pronounced as we evolve- it’s so very helpful for drinking out of bottles.
I bet angelina jolie has one hell of a time drinking out of plastic bottles with that huge upper lip.
Naw, I bet she’s all self conscious of it and lways asks for a straw.

Lots of folks around here are gettign all swine flu-ed. I am trying to keep my distance, but meh- it’s probably just a matter of time.

Matt finally posted my Die O Rama! But left out some good pix.
Post um tomorrow. gotta jam!

Lost but not found.

Sigh.
As if my life wasn’t busy enough with halloween on its way and assistant coaching a team of nine year old girls and my Dog group…
God (or whoever it is up there that runs this show) has decided that throwing the most beautiful stray dog into the mix is just the right amount of crazy for me.

It started last light, around 6 pm. I had stayed home from work because I blew out my throat at the county fair. Rudy and I were coming back from the store and we stomped hard on teh brakes right around teh corner from our house.
There was a dog- a beautiful blue dog, rolling in the lawn of our neighbor’s house. Rudy and I gasped- it looked just like Cash!
We freaked out. I jumped out of the car and rudy went to park it. I called Cash- but the dog got up and I realized it wasn’t Cash.
It looked just like him- it was a blue brindle Pit Bull- a girl.
Part of my stomach flipped- if I didn’t get her and rein her in, she’d be a goner quick. Who knows who would pick her up and what kind of life she would have.
She could get hit by a car. Someone could be missing her.
So we corraled her in- some treats, a looped leash… and I got her bagged. SHe was such a good girl.
I walked her around the neighborhood, hopign someone would recognize her.
As I asked, people kept asking- That’s not your dog?! People thought she was Cash.
Eventually I got directed down thE backside of my block, where a gentleman was conviced that she was his neighbor’s dog. The dog didn’t respind to her name, which was “Socks”.
We put her in her backyard and left our number with the neighbor to let us know how it pans out.

Fifteen minutes later, we got a call- The dog wasn’t Socks. We had to go back and get her.

So my friend Kim and I went to get her. By this point, I was calling her Honey, cause she was just so amazingly sweet.
She hopped into Kim’s car and we cruised the neighborhood for a bit hoping we would see soemone looking around for a dog.

Eventually we realized she’s going to have to go SOMEWHERE. Since we didn’t know her temperment we were reluctant to take her to our own homes- so we decided to put her in teh overnight boxes at the shelter.
God threw another wrench in our works- Of the 6 overnight pens at the shelter, two were big-dog sized and four were small dog/cat sized.
And Both big dog pens were full- one with a very sick looking teacup poodle, and another with a young mother cat and 6 kittens.

We couldn’t leave her at the shelter.

With some string pulling, we were able to find a place to put Honey for the night- the side of our yard away from Cash’s kennel. She had to stay outside becuase She is NOT GOOD WITH CATS and the cats take the garage for the night.

Rudy is taking Honey to the Shelter today.
We hope her owners are looking for her and the Shelter is the first place I would look.
However, Our shelter only adopts Pit Bulls to Rescues- so if Honey doesn’t get claimed in Seven Days, she’s gone.
I’m hoping that if Honey doesn’t get home, we may be able to get my friend Ann- who runs a rescue- to get Honey sprung.

If worse comes to worst, we may foster Honey- but I just want Honey to go home.

dress up!

 said I would, so I am.

My dog Cash is a great goober of a dog.
One could say I’m biased.
But you would be hard pressed to find a dog willing to do many of the things Cash does for nothing more than a small nibble of a treat and a bum scratch.
Especially since many of his stunts involve wearing a variety of mildy functional attire.

I tell you, this dog puts up with anything i dish out at him. It’s a testament to his breed- the American Pit Bull Terrier is known for being able to be manhandled by his owner with nary a whine or complaint.
Well, Cash will sometimes let me know he’s not happy by pawing or attempting to back out- but a treat will cause him to stand stock still and take the “abuse”.

Some of my bully-owning friends say that dressing up a Pit Bull perpetuates the breed poorly- people may get the idea that they are easy to take care of and are good dogs for average people.
Other people say that dressing them up makes them less macho.

And I say- If dressing my dog up causes strangers to have a GOOD REACTION to a pit bull, how is that BAD?
If People feel more comfortable asking me questions if my dog is in a dinosaur costume than bare skin- that’s fine with me.
He doesn’t care- he gets pets and cookies- so he’s happy as a clam, despite the goofy getup.
It’s about EDUCATION, not about image.
Talking about the breed, teaching people how to act around dogs, teaching them NOT TO FEAR.

Ultimately, it comes down to the fact that no, this breed isn’t easy.
Owning a dog isn’t easy. If you think it is- then you’re doing something wrong.

Dogs have the mental capacity of a two-year old.
Now add the heft of 80 lbs to that and a stubborn streak- and you got yourself Cash here.
How can THAT be easy?

So, off my high horse.
And on to the photos!

*  *  * 
Cash has a variety of functional items that he wears.

Raincoat for a wet day- no one likes the smell of wet dog, and not giving Cash his daily walk is the equivalent of a fuzzy wrecking ball.

His Doggy backpack. When we go hiking, we carry backpacks. Why not let cash do the same? That way he can carry his own water, his own snacks instead of us breakign our back for him. He also really likes his pack- it means ADVENTURE!

A couple I pass off as functional, but are more for my amusement.

This dog sweater makes him look like a tough guy- like that bruiser bulldog from the Looney Tunes cartoons.

The doggles are my newest acquisition. I claim that they are to protect his eyes from teh sun and the gravel- he likes to stick his head out of the truck and that’s dangerous!
But honestly, how can you be afraid of a dog wearing goggles?! YOU CANT!

And A couple are just to see what he will take- how far he will let me go.

 His halloween costume last year. He was a shark. Freekin’ hilarious. I thought the blue would match better, but whatever, eveyone was drunk.

For the Christmas Prade, I made Cash a Jingle Collar and bought a matching hat. I thoguth he was going to try and eat that hat, but no! He would rather eat ham chunks I had in my treat bag.

I am still begging for photos of Cash from the Saddle Horse parade… I hand made Cash a vinyl Saddle! He had no problem wearing it and people thought it was great.

bonk.

So, lets revive this thing.
Im pretty down today and need to talk to someone- why not this?

It’s coming to the christmas season at my job and I’ve been working quite hard- trying to devote myself to my job in an effort to make sure it’s secure. As I watch people around me lose their homes and their jobs, struggle with bills and drown in debt, I have thrown myself into my job and my extracurricuar activities in an attempt to keep my mind off of… well, not impending doom, but that feeling that just around teh corner is teh Darkness that could change your entire damn world. If I’m to busy to see it, then it’s not there, right?
That’s a pretty morbid way to think about it, but as of late… it starts to become more true than ever.

In the past month Rudy got a new Motorcycle. it’s a harley this time around and he’s just in love with the thing. His first vehicle was a motorcycle and it’s been two years since he’s had his own. Earlier this year he was just falling apart about not having one. He borrowed one for a day in july and damn if it just made it worse. So we saved up some money, searched for the right bike, and he’s on two wheels again and I don’t think I’ve seen him any happier.

So I have been busy with dog training classes -Cash failed his CGC again last night, and I’m really bummed about that.
I tried so hard, but there always seems to be something that goes wrong, and Cash botches it.
I mean- He is an awesome dog, but I just want the world to know it.
Doubly so becuase of his breed.
But that’s alright. He can pass, I just need to work more.
my CGC class teacher is really devoted to getting him to pass and I know she will help me work along with it.

Anyway! I’m also kinda bummed that matt is dead.
Well, he’s not REALLY dead- but honestly, how do we know or not?
Its coming to be the most imporant season of the year and we haven’t seen hair or hide of matt in months.
I think it’s gotten all the X-E’ers down.
all of us blogging x-ers have kind of felt the pinch.
And while we’re all plugging along as best we can, we are hurting a bit too.

Anyway, kick out the downer stuff.
It’s turning to fall… which means my thoughts are turning to HALLOWEEN!
Have to thank the Deej for the soon-to-be-in-mah-belly candy corn soda- I’m so psyched.
Love getting stuff in the mail.
Even bills.

Did y’all know I was almost a postal worker?
Passed the test and everything.
The only reason I couldn’t was because the posotion was for a rural route driver and I need two years of driving under my belt…
only had one.
sad panda.
One of these days I’m gonna try again.
Y’know, when the USPS stops hemmoraging money.

Getting back into Mail Art. Really excited about that. just the idea that I’m arting again is totally cool I’m painting and sculpting and mailing stuff- it’s totally fun and I just love it. I’ve been too stifled for too long and I think Work had to do with it.

Weird how this blog post came full circle.

 Anyway. work to do. see ya in a few.

another Phone Photo Post.

I feel so left out not showing off my camera phone pix. While when I got my phone it was really important that I have one- I rarely use it. However, when I do need it, it’s so sweet that it’s right there. Besides, me writing shit down? WITH MY HANDWRITING? Shit. Just take a pic.

So a lot of these photos are ancient. That’s cool, right?

Anyway- off we go!

This one… uhm. Yeah, looks like exactly what it is. Me taking a pic of the store hours of a place we simply can’t seem to get the hours right on. Every time we go, the damn place is closed. It’s actually a pretty neat picture- the mirrored tinting makes for an interesting composition.

Ohman. Uhm. I had to go to a Motivation Seminar. There were some interesting moments, and it was a day out of the office, but everything else was lame. Even my lunch was lackadaisical (I love that word). So yah. I doodled. A picture of Cash, asking for more turkey necks. He likes turkey necks.

Rudy gave his brothers Raiders tickets for Christmas. They went and tailgated for three hours before the game. His younger brother took this picture of him. I really quite like it. And uhm… yeah, that flag hangs in front of our house, seriously. It makes it look like I live with a houseful of goddamn pirates. Well, cause I do. Anyway.

This one- wow. That is old. Okay. Back when I worked at BevMo, we were working Christmas eve, and it was dead slow. My assistant manager is a prankster, and to play a joke on our receiver, he stacked all the empty kegs in front of the receiving door. And… well, it kinda grew. There’s a lot of crap there- lots of empty kegs, keg buckets, packing peanuts and we somehow wound up with a bunch of tinsel. It was probably the best day of work EVER. And then I walked out after closing to find my tires were slashed.

When a moment comes up like this, you can’t pass it up. Edgar- Rudy’s cousin, and my honorary brother- is a mechanic. He got a contract with the Sheriff’s department to work on their cars… and somehow, a Santa Cruz County Sheriff lost his driver’s side door.

And this last one… We pass by a full-scale Stonehenge replica every time we drive to Washington State. This last time we drove, we stopped and finally checked it out. Simply awe-inspiring. There also seems to be a monument erected to Sam Hill there…

There ay go kidlets. Hope the stories were interesting, enjoy das piccies!

Survivalism.

I am going camping for the weekend.

Strangely enough, this is the third time I have gone camping this year.

Normally we’ve been pretty moderate with our camping. Once, maybe twice in the season.  This year, we camped in Mid march (froze our asses off) and then again in May- as I told you the tale of  the Shitty Winds.

Our desire to aggressively camp comes from our desire to be prepared. If shit ever hits the fan, we want to be sure that we can get up and go.

Rudy is worried about the end of the B’ak’tun and thinks it would be better to be prepared and ready to go out into the wilderness, than to be unprepared and wait for the inevitable if we stay in the cities. Cities are always the epicenter for major civil disruptions; so the further you are from a city, the less you will be affected.

I don’t want to believe that 2012 will be TEOTWAWKI (the end of the world as we know it), but I want to at least put up a fight if it is. My larger concern is population and our own sustainability. This earth can’t sustain us for much longer if we keep up our rate of consumption, so we should find ways to take care of ourselves on our own- without having to fight for resources.

Our goal of saving our asses is simple. We load up our gear, and Cash in the truck. We drive as far as we can into the local valleys and find a place to call our own. If we need to, we will ditch the truck and hike in further. Our gear isn’t light; by we’ve determined we can manage it. Besides, we live in California- our winters are moderate. Snow clothes will keep us more than warm in the just-above-freezing chill. Considering San Benito County is less than 100,000 people- many who are already able to take care of themselves- we shouldn’t have a problem finding a gully or creek we can hide out in. The lands just south of us are rough and rugged, and the home of ancient volcanoes- so the land is rich and rife with wilderness. Wild pig are plentiful, ground squirrel are easy pickings. We could always eat vegetation.

Cash has a decent prey drive; an empty belly will easily increase it- he can hunt his own food. He can also serve as sentry and guard. Pit Bulls are also known for being great pig dogs; he can help with taking down a variety of animals. If our ancestors used dogs, we can definitely benefit by his inclusion in our party.

Our preparation is far from complete. But by simply getting started, we are father along than a large portion of the population.

 Are you prepared?

Dog Days of Hollister

Wow, so this weekend was just… wow!

I had my huge HDOG event, which totally blew my mind- it was so much better than I had imagined. We had over 20 vendors, a dozen rescues. We had 7 dogs pass their CGC tests ( awesome!) and almost 500 people attended the event in its first year! We only had one dog squabble and it was between two dogs who knew each other in a high energy area.

Cash fell in love with lure coursing. I know he’ll never be competition level, but he enjoys it so much that I want to make it a regular habit for him. He was also an amazing breed ambassador- he kept his wits and manners about him and generally enjoyed himself.

The event did fatigue me hardcore, though. I’m still sore from all the EZ-ups, the tables, the mopping, the setting up and taking down of everything. But it was so worth it. So much more than what I expected it to be. The final monies aren’t in, but it was a success nevertheless.

I think what amped me the most was that my Dog Days design was featured everywhere! It was on Tshirts, bags, magnets and keychains. It made me all giddy and mushy- and I couldn’t stop smiling. They even had to order a second batch of t’s due to demand! It feels good to see that my work is so admired.

Not only that, but the City has finally given the go-ahead to start making a Dog park out at our Airport. That’s got us psyched. All of our hard work has finally given us a place to begin calling our own! I feel so proud to be a part of something big like this.

And even moreso since they offered me the position of Treasurer since the VP stepped down and all the other positions moved up. Right now being the treasurer doesn’t mean much- there’s no true Cash flow, but as things begin moving they’ll be needing my help to manage things- we’re actually all in this together and I’m glad to be a part of it as well as have the support.

And being the only Committee member with a full blood Pittie kid, I feel like I am going to only help the Bully community with such a high profile position and such an amazing beast under my control.

So that’s been my week so far… just reeling!

 Here’s some pix for you guys to enjoy.

Ooh, don’t those cookies look good enough to eat? Well, you can, but they are fer Doggies! The Girl Scouts outdid themselves, no?

This is what it’s all about- doggies from all different walks of life being doggies. This here is a red/fawn Dobie and a  Dogue de Bordeaux. Both are 5 months old.

Here’s a pic of Beasley- Cash’s buddy. Bees is half pit/ half dane… and all submissive effeminate goober. I think that’s why Cash loves him.

Irish Wolfhounds. Just… amazing dogs. They are so elegant but goofy with all that hair. Someday I’ll have one. Maybe.

This was a part of the Search and Rescue Demo. I had an idea that dogs could climb ladders, but have never seen it before. What a trip!

Here is a pic of Cash taking off for lure-coursing. I had never seen him throw himself into a run like he did that day- he looked like a lion tearing after an antelope! It wasn’t elegance- it was the power in his stride that amazed me.

Enjoy, y’all!

Pumpkin Carving- Pit Bull Style.

Well… insanity has run rampant in my life… I need not get into it here. I rarely have time to be on this infernal machine for pleasure ( not like that, you sick fools… ) so I don’t get much socializing, writing or posting anymore. Myabe that’s a good thing. I do miss writing though, and whipped up a special piece just for all y’all.

It does involve my dog, so if you aren’t interested in seeing a goofy LOLdog story about Cash and one of his new favorite past times, you can go read Billy’s Blog. Or… you know… THE NEWS. ‘Cause yeah- THE NEWS is just so much more fun.

losers.

Okay. So- Halloween Hit me like a freight train. With work to do, and a party to throw, and sugar skuls for the Dia De Los Muertos altar to whip out of thin fuckign air… yea… SO NOT PREPARED. Which meant that rather than carving TWO pumpkins like I sually do, I only got to do one. Which meant one massive pumpkin was sitting around my home, taking up space and potentially threatening to mold.

A couple of weeks ago I saw a picture sequence of a Pit Bull “Carving” a pumpkin. The little guy made scarpe marks and it was cute. I looked at the photos and thought “Destructo-Dog here will do much Better- or worse-or whatever.”

So, todat- with Labor Day off from work for me to do my will in my still-Halloween-Decorated home ( I’ll take it all down today, I SWEAR)… I decided to spend some time with the dog… and a pumpkin.

*apologize in advance for the weord quality- cellphones are awesome but their pictures rarely are.*

Herm, So wats is dis be? Iz crunchy nom noms for Meeh? *crunch crunch* Smells weeird, but it rolls! Maybe is big crunchy ball.

Lookz! Iz liek teh woods on teh fence but no is be leaving splinter in teefies. * crunch crunch* I likes teh crunchies too! Bite-Tear-Spit Out… Bite-Tear-Spit Out… I coulds do dis fer many days.

Ohh! Teh mess I maeks! Pumpkin guts and seedies and rind all overs teh yard! I not care- I no has to clean up! Just Bite-Tear-Spit Out! Dis is teh best noms EVER!

I loves tis Noms! I picks it up when Mumies gets too close- and runs off to be alone with my awesome Noms! But I ’s getting so tired of dis Bite-Tear-Spit out thing. Not TIRED like bored… but  my mouf is so TIRED!

Mumies takes a pix of my piece of artwork. So nuanced, so fresh and bold! I mean…. dats what teh artist-people say when they sees this. And den they pets me. And maybe some treats… And den some bummy skritches… oh yeah…

Being an artist is hards work…

unless it is tasty hard work- then… is not so bad, akshually.

cam-peenk.

wao. madness!

Sorry I couldn’t post when I got back.

I got back Sunday night, recuperated all Monday and had to hop on the crazy-mad project that is recreating ALL the product images for all the items we carry at RMCD… That’s a LOT of images. We’re probably nearing 5000 products. Battening of the Hatches ensued.

Anyway.

I have some images. And some things to remember when you camp.

As dutifully shown here- do NOT take pictures of people AS SOON AS THEY LEAVE THEIR TENT… especially before they have had their morning caffeine. ESPECIALLY when camping. That picture could have been way nicer if I was given a few minutes… but I look like I just rolled off a park bench. I don’t even think I have a bra on there.  Thanks Dad.

When someone offers you sunblock, put it on. Don’t think it will make a clever picture, becuase while it will, it also means you may very well be getting burnt. Which I did. Which I am paying for. Bright Sun+ fair irish skin= sunburn followed by extensive peeling. yuck.

Since there is no TV, bring stuff to do. otherwise you’ll be trying to make fire With your bare hands ( we tried) feeding stray rodents ( we did, at risk of THE PLAGUE!) and generally annoying the crap out of your campmates. Here we can see the tools of our entertainment- booze, liars’ dice and cards. Everytime someone lost a game (we even played speed and crazy eights!) the loser had to shoot.

Also- bring shot glasses. There is a REASON bartenders aren’t allowed to drink on the job.

Bring a hammock. Your sore-from-sleeping-on-the-ground back will thank you for it. See- Doesn’t that just look fuckin’ AWESOME?!  Yeah. And beer. That ice chest is full of beer. he didn’t move for 2 hours.

Keep your food put away. Ice chests, trunks of cars, whatever. Little plague-carrying shits had NO shame. They stole food from MY DOG, while he was laying two feet from his bowl! Little shits. Couldn’t even wait for us to open the peanut bag- ripped a hole right in it. Fucking chipmunks. and Stellar’s Jays can kiss my ass too. Fucking foul-mouthed bastards waking me up like a damn alarm clock with all that screaming…

When you want your dad to stop talking to you about how he doesn’t want some n***** in office and all the Mexicans need to go home ( while Rudy stands slackjawed and laughing), put your head in a book and pretend you’re so involved in reading you CAN’T EVEN HEAR HIM. That shuts him up real fast. Crazy old man.

And go for a hike. Hide for a while. That’s why you came out here, isn’t it? Enjoy the silence.

black cloud…

Cash got into a heated battle with a golden retriever he knows at the dog park yesterday. Wasn’t just a short squabble. What seemed like regular horseplay escalated in mere seconds- we both didn’t spot the signs until it was too late. But to be honest, we really wanted our dogs to just get along and we should have recognized signs and taken our dogs apart before it got too far.

From what the owner tells me, her dog is actually much better off than Cash is- just a puncture in an armpit and on the neck. Cash has multiple punctures on and around his face.

A vet tech happened to be there at the time and told us both to just keep the wound sites clean and apply neosporin and they should be fine. But she didn’t get to see the one behind his ear or on his neck – we didn’t find thouse until a second, less adrenaline-fueled check-over at home as we were cleaning him.

So we’re going to the vet to see if he needs stitches. We think he might- not only that but we really want to avoid any scarring on the face- it’s bad enough he got into a fight, we don’t need daily reminders.

What I am trying to wrap my brain around was… could this have been prevented? Part of me says no.
But part of me says I should have known better. Cash is a PIT BULL! Maybe the media is right and I have a killing machine for my best friend.

Am I just being naiive and pretending that Cash is the same as any other dog?
Or do I really need to treat him like a super-max prisoner and never let him around other dogs again?
Is he really a “loaded gun”?
What is this going to do to his reaction with other dogs?
Will he never be able to go to the dog park again?

I mean- I guess it’s true that if Cash really wanted to, he could have torn Bailey apart.
But he didn’t.
So that says volumes for his personality and training. Right?

Still- there’s this black cloud over my head and I’m wondering if it will ever go away.