29
Oct
09

blargity!

Okay, you all know by now that i get infatuated with stuff all the time.

So… right now?
Questionable Content.
I’ve been reading for two weeks from teh first one and I’m just caught up.
I am definitely a Faye kind of person- no touchy!
rawr. fckin awkward hilarousness.

also, yall are invited to my halloween party.
*nods*
I’m going to be Coraline.
And Cash will be Dogzilla.
Gotta modify his costume.
apparently he’s too beefy for an XL and I need to add elastic bands if I want his mostrous legs to fit in the sleeves.

another thought- that thingie in between our top lip?
I bet they get more pronounced as we evolve- it’s so very helpful for drinking out of bottles.
I bet angelina jolie has one hell of a time drinking out of plastic bottles with that huge upper lip.
Naw, I bet she’s all self conscious of it and lways asks for a straw.

Lots of folks around here are gettign all swine flu-ed. I am trying to keep my distance, but meh- it’s probably just a matter of time.

Matt finally posted my Die O Rama! But left out some good pix.
Post um tomorrow. gotta jam!

15
Oct
09

folding knives suck.

hey guys-
as a note of tact, don’t email your girlfriend to tell her you just got stitches.
FOR ANY REASON.

A phone call is much more personal, and will be be easier on her psyche if she can hear that you’re okay.

*sighs*

I don’t care if Rudy has stitches, I’m gonna kick his ass tonight.

09
Oct
09

Shoe Box Die-O-Rama…

Since almost everyone that reads this goes to X-E, you know the results.

If you don’t- well, to be simple, I lost the Die-O-Rama Contest.
Pretty badly, if I do say so myself.

I’d talk about it- but I’m not feeling very happy, or good about myself- and it involves lots of cursing.
So.
I’ll just leave it at that.

07
Oct
09

Honey is Home!

Stopped by the shelter today to see if Honey was still there. Part of me was so angry that I put her life in danger- our shelter only allows rescues to adopt pit bulls and Honey only had 8 days to be claimed before she was put down. I could only think of the misery and suffering she must be enduring in that lonely, cold cell. I figured if she was there, I’d say hello and let her know that she’s not alone.

So I stopped in, and one of the Animal Control officers recognized me. She knew that we had brought in a dog yesterday and informed me that Candy (her name is Candy! how cyoot!) was picked up yesterday. So she wasn’t even at the shelter very long before her owner got her!

Also turns out that Candy doesn’t live too far away.
Not sure where, but ACO told me that they live only a block or so away.

So I can rest and breathe easy again. I did exactly what i should have, and it panned out.

06
Oct
09

Lost but not found.

Sigh.
As if my life wasn’t busy enough with halloween on its way and assistant coaching a team of nine year old girls and my Dog group…
God (or whoever it is up there that runs this show) has decided that throwing the most beautiful stray dog into the mix is just the right amount of crazy for me.

It started last light, around 6 pm. I had stayed home from work because I blew out my throat at the county fair. Rudy and I were coming back from the store and we stomped hard on teh brakes right around teh corner from our house.
There was a dog- a beautiful blue dog, rolling in the lawn of our neighbor’s house. Rudy and I gasped- it looked just like Cash!
We freaked out. I jumped out of the car and rudy went to park it. I called Cash- but the dog got up and I realized it wasn’t Cash.
It looked just like him- it was a blue brindle Pit Bull- a girl.
Part of my stomach flipped- if I didn’t get her and rein her in, she’d be a goner quick. Who knows who would pick her up and what kind of life she would have.
She could get hit by a car. Someone could be missing her.
So we corraled her in- some treats, a looped leash… and I got her bagged. SHe was such a good girl.
I walked her around the neighborhood, hopign someone would recognize her.
As I asked, people kept asking- That’s not your dog?! People thought she was Cash.
Eventually I got directed down thE backside of my block, where a gentleman was conviced that she was his neighbor’s dog. The dog didn’t respind to her name, which was “Socks”.
We put her in her backyard and left our number with the neighbor to let us know how it pans out.

Fifteen minutes later, we got a call- The dog wasn’t Socks. We had to go back and get her.

So my friend Kim and I went to get her. By this point, I was calling her Honey, cause she was just so amazingly sweet.
She hopped into Kim’s car and we cruised the neighborhood for a bit hoping we would see soemone looking around for a dog.

Eventually we realized she’s going to have to go SOMEWHERE. Since we didn’t know her temperment we were reluctant to take her to our own homes- so we decided to put her in teh overnight boxes at the shelter.
God threw another wrench in our works- Of the 6 overnight pens at the shelter, two were big-dog sized and four were small dog/cat sized.
And Both big dog pens were full- one with a very sick looking teacup poodle, and another with a young mother cat and 6 kittens.

We couldn’t leave her at the shelter.

With some string pulling, we were able to find a place to put Honey for the night- the side of our yard away from Cash’s kennel. She had to stay outside becuase She is NOT GOOD WITH CATS and the cats take the garage for the night.

Rudy is taking Honey to the Shelter today.
We hope her owners are looking for her and the Shelter is the first place I would look.
However, Our shelter only adopts Pit Bulls to Rescues- so if Honey doesn’t get claimed in Seven Days, she’s gone.
I’m hoping that if Honey doesn’t get home, we may be able to get my friend Ann- who runs a rescue- to get Honey sprung.

If worse comes to worst, we may foster Honey- but I just want Honey to go home.

29
Sep
09

dress up!

 said I would, so I am.

My dog Cash is a great goober of a dog.
One could say I’m biased.
But you would be hard pressed to find a dog willing to do many of the things Cash does for nothing more than a small nibble of a treat and a bum scratch.
Especially since many of his stunts involve wearing a variety of mildy functional attire.

I tell you, this dog puts up with anything i dish out at him. It’s a testament to his breed- the American Pit Bull Terrier is known for being able to be manhandled by his owner with nary a whine or complaint.
Well, Cash will sometimes let me know he’s not happy by pawing or attempting to back out- but a treat will cause him to stand stock still and take the “abuse”.

Some of my bully-owning friends say that dressing up a Pit Bull perpetuates the breed poorly- people may get the idea that they are easy to take care of and are good dogs for average people.
Other people say that dressing them up makes them less macho.

And I say- If dressing my dog up causes strangers to have a GOOD REACTION to a pit bull, how is that BAD?
If People feel more comfortable asking me questions if my dog is in a dinosaur costume than bare skin- that’s fine with me.
He doesn’t care- he gets pets and cookies- so he’s happy as a clam, despite the goofy getup.
It’s about EDUCATION, not about image.
Talking about the breed, teaching people how to act around dogs, teaching them NOT TO FEAR.

Ultimately, it comes down to the fact that no, this breed isn’t easy.
Owning a dog isn’t easy. If you think it is- then you’re doing something wrong.

Dogs have the mental capacity of a two-year old.
Now add the heft of 80 lbs to that and a stubborn streak- and you got yourself Cash here.
How can THAT be easy?

So, off my high horse.
And on to the photos!

*  *  * 
Cash has a variety of functional items that he wears.

Raincoat for a wet day- no one likes the smell of wet dog, and not giving Cash his daily walk is the equivalent of a fuzzy wrecking ball.


His Doggy backpack. When we go hiking, we carry backpacks. Why not let cash do the same? That way he can carry his own water, his own snacks instead of us breakign our back for him. He also really likes his pack- it means ADVENTURE!


A couple I pass off as functional, but are more for my amusement.

This dog sweater makes him look like a tough guy- like that bruiser bulldog from the Looney Tunes cartoons.


The doggles are my newest acquisition. I claim that they are to protect his eyes from teh sun and the gravel- he likes to stick his head out of the truck and that’s dangerous!
But honestly, how can you be afraid of a dog wearing goggles?! YOU CANT!


And A couple are just to see what he will take- how far he will let me go.

 His halloween costume last year. He was a shark. Freekin’ hilarious. I thought the blue would match better, but whatever, eveyone was drunk.

For the Christmas Prade, I made Cash a Jingle Collar and bought a matching hat. I thoguth he was going to try and eat that hat, but no! He would rather eat ham chunks I had in my treat bag.

I am still begging for photos of Cash from the Saddle Horse parade… I hand made Cash a vinyl Saddle! He had no problem wearing it and people thought it was great.

25
Sep
09

dear smoking motorists…

please stop flicking your smoldering cigarette butts out your window.

You’re setting fires.

It may not be so bad in say, a suburban area with paved gutters and maintained lawns.
But in cattle land, farms and wild lands- you’re gonna set something ablaze.
ESPECIALLY after the harsh summer we’ve had.

Besdies, you shouldn’t be throwing shit out your car in the first place.

Have you seen the carnage you cause?

You torch thousands of acres.

You put hardworking men into jeopardy.

You inadvertently kill animals, people and ruin the livelihood of ranchers, farmers and park rangers.

And I’m not saying you don’t HAVE TO SMOKE.
It’s a free country.

I’m just asking you to NOT THROW YOUR DAMN GARBAGE OUT YOUR WINDOW!
That’s what ashtrays are for.
And if you don’t have one- FUCKING GET ONE.

I’d say thank you- but hell, you should know better.




whatisthis?

This blog is about my take on the life that this world has deemed to give me. Sometimes its teh hawtness. Sometimes, esh caca. I write all about it- and rarely pause to form decent grammatical sentences. Or even if it MAKES sense.
enjoy.

-Kelli

bandsofthemoment…

currently on album repeat...

1) the ramones-rocket to russia
2) shooter jennings-electric rodeo
3) lamb of god-new american gospel
4) clutch-jam room
5) fear factory-obsolete

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